My Star Sign for today actually makes sense…
The Bottom Line
Today’s tasks won’t take too much energy or enthusiasm – it’s an autopilot today.
Do you know your limits? Now’s a great time to get a better idea of what you can and cannot do, or else you will end up getting frustrated. Recently, you have been pushing yourself to stretch and grow, but if you continue on this aggressive path you will get overwhelmed. To prevent that, you have to take care of yourself. It’s time to act more conservatively and slow down. Take a step back from life — you won’t miss out on a thing.
I woke up at 5:30 pm today. Boyfriend and I were supposed to go to GH, have a dinner (it’s our monthsary) and watch a movie… we’ve changed that into a nice dinner at home. We’ll probably spend a most of the night watching DVDs or Visionaries, eating homemade popcorn. I am mentally and emotionally exhausted. I really do need to just stop and rest.
Sometimes I feel that more appropriate term is to give myself a break… and maybe forgive myself a little.
Work is no longer a refuge these days… it’s not what I do that’s become a chore, it’s the people I deal with. Deep, deep down inside I’m in awe of what Aida did – leaving the company after 6 years of working there. When something like this happens – someone I know deciding to change their paths – it makes me wonder why I can’t do it. I’ve got good credentials, I know I’m highly competent and absolutely brilliant (=p)… so why can’t I let go of this thing that is starting to tear at my soul and try finding fulfillment elsewhere?
I know I have to stop being afraid of having to start again. Why is this so difficult when I’ve rewritten myself so many times?
*sigh* So many questions… so little time to figure out the answers.
In an effort not to depress myself to death, let’s move on to other things…
I’ve finally finished Kathleen McGowan’s Book of Love. It took me a while to get into it, but once I did, I couldn’t put the book down (which caused me a couple of sleepless mornings). As a tribute to the beautiful passages that I’ve read, I’m planning to put some of it here. This blog’s earned a couple of steady readers and I know they’d appreciate that too.
Currently, I’m fixating on Emmy Rossum and her song “Slow Me Down”. It’s very reminiscent of Michelle Tumes’ Lovely which, by the way, Rossum has revived. It’s haunting without sounding too much like a Gregorian Chant. I’ve asked Boyfriend to download her songs for me.
I had a couple of weird dreams today – none of which I can remember with much clarity. I have this feeling that I dreamt of one thing, became semi-awake, fell back asleep and dreamt of something else. What I do remember is one of my dreams had Rachelle in it. I wish from the bottom of my heart that I could remember what it was about. All I have left is knowing that in the dream we were very much aware of each other’s existence… to the point that we actually had conversations. Again, I wished I could remember more.
Oooohh… Dinner time! Gotta go! Gotta go! Gotta go!
Holed Up In The Big Room in Colorado
Drowning in The Hum of the Aircon