Tag Archives: Message

2014: My Songs Know What You Did In The Dark

Oh, I never done this before
Never wanna do this again
Wrong turn on a dusty road
I did it to myself, I can’t pretend
Well, I learned just a little too late
Good God, I must’ve been blind
‘Cause she got me for everything, everything, everything, alright

Like my daddy I’m a gambling man
Never been afraid to roll the dice
But when I put my bet on her
Little Miss Snake eyes ruined my life
She better sleep with one eye open
Better make sure to lock her doors
‘Cause once I get my hands on her, Imma oh

Natalie ‒ she ran away with all my money
And she did it for fun
Natalie ‒ she’s probably out there thinking it’s funny
Telling everyone
Well, I’m digging a ditch
For this gold-digging bitch
Watch out ‒ she’s quick
Look out for a pretty little thing named
Natalie ‒ if you see her tell her I’m coming
She better run

The good lord better bless your soul
‘Cause I done already cursed your name
Don’t matter which way you go
Payback’s gonna come your way
You’ll be begging me, please, please, please
And now I look at you and laugh, laugh, laugh
While you sit there and cry for me, cry for me, cry for me all night

I spend a lifetime in jail (yeah, that’s what I’ll do)
I’ll be smiling in my cell (yeah, thinking bout you)
Can’t nobody save you now
So there ain’t no use in trying
Once I get my hands on you, Imma oh

Natalie ‒ she ran away with all my money
And she did it for fun
Natalie ‒ she’s probably out there thinking it’s funny
Telling everyone
Well, I’m digging a ditch
For this gold-digging bitch
Watch out ‒ she’s quick
Look out for a pretty little thing named
Natalie ‒ if you see her tell her I’m coming
She better run

I should’ve known better (I should’ve known better)
‘Cause when we were together (‘Cause when we were together)
She never said forever (She never said forever)
I’m a fool that played her game, hey

Natalie ‒ she ran away with all my money
And she did it for fun
Natalie ‒ she’s probably out there thinking it’s funny
Telling everyone
Well, I’m digging a ditch
For this gold-digging bitch
Watch out ‒ she’s quick
Look out for a pretty little thing named
Natalie ‒ if you see her tell her I’m coming
She better run

“Natalie”
Bruno Mars
*video by Walk Off the Earth*

***

Feel free to stab yourself if you feel like it. *smirk*

Dark & Twisted

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23.19: Dancing Through the Fire

Universal Truth.

I have found the statements “No one can make you feel inferior without your consent” and “Loving someone means giving them the right to hurt you” to be incredibly conflicting.

Especially when you happen to believe both to be true.

 

 

Dark & Twisted…

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21.13: I Think I Dreamed You Into Life

In Your Eyes I See My Future In An Instant

For the daily text messages and the nightly phone calls… All before we ever set eyes on each other.

I will always love you.

***

Maybe it’s intuition
But some things you just don’t question
Like in your eyes
I see my future in an instant
and there it goes
I think I’ve found my best friend
I know that it might sound more than
a little crazy but I believe

[chorus:]

I knew I loved you before I met you
I think I dreamed you into life
I knew I loved you before I met you
I have been waiting all my life

There’s just no rhyme or reason
only this sense of completion
and in your eyes
I see the missing pieces
I’m searching for
I think I found my way home
I know that it might sound more than
a little crazy but I believe

[repeat chorus]

A thousand angels dance around you
I am complete now that I found you

[repeat chorus to fade]

I Knew I Loved You,
Savage Garden

 

 

Blessed Be…

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18.13: Songs for You

It’s been a while, hasn’t it?

It’s not that I’ve had nothing to write about – on the contrary. I guess it’s rather hard to write about life when you’re a little too busy living it.

But we are all called to do certain things… And, once again, I have been called to put words on (cyber) paper.

*          *          *

I recently discovered this sweet song by Taylor Swift called “Begin Again”. It reminded me of how it all began for me with my husband all those months ago. Sometimes I wonder if he has noticed how many times I’ve played that song at home. What can I say? I’m a hopeless romantic till the end.

Took a deep breath in the mirror
He didn’t like it when I wore high heels
But I do
Turn the lock and put my headphones on
He always said he didn’t get this song
But I do, I do

Walked in expecting you’d be late
But you got here early and you stand and wave
I walk to you
You pull my chair out and help me in
And you don’t know how nice that is
But I do

And you throw your head back laughing like a little kid
I think it’s strange that you think I’m funny ’cause he never did
I’ve been spending the last eight months
Thinking all love ever does is break and burn and end
But on a Wednesday in a cafe I watched it begin again

You said you never met one girl
Who had as many James Taylor records as you
But I do
We tell stories and you don’t know why
I’m coming off a little shy
But I do

But you throw your head back laughing like a little kid
I think it’s strange that you think I’m funny ’cause he never did

I’ve been spending the last eight months
Thinking all love ever does is break and burn and end
But on a Wednesday in a cafe I watched it begin again

And we walked down the block to my car and I almost brought him up
But you start to talk about the movies that your family watches
Every single Christmas and I want to talk about that
And for the first time what’s past is past

‘Cause you throw your head back laughing like a little kid
I think it’s strange that you think I’m funny ’cause he never did
I’ve been spending the last eight months

Thinking all love ever does is break and burn and end
But on a Wednesday in a cafe I watched it begin again

But on a Wednesday in a cafe I watched it begin again

“Begin Again”
Taylor Swift

*          *          *

And because this song (and its video) is the cutest thing ever, it gave me the brilliant idea to list down songs that have mattered to me. To him. To us.

And here we go…

The Song: Love of My Life (The Wedding Song), Darla Day
The Words: “…You’re the one I prayed for long ago / Fearless trust I never thought I’d know / I’ve found the answer to my dreams / My eyes were opened to love’s mystery…”
The Reason: This song was given to me, mind you 🙂

The Song: Fade Into You, OST Nashville
The Words: “… If you were a window and I was the rain / I’d pour myself out and wash off the pain / I’d fall like a tear so your light could shine through / Then I’d just fade into you…”
The Reason: I LOVE this song. It’s the kind that has a melody that wraps itself around you and never lets go.

The Song: Blessed, Christina Aguilera
The Words: “…Blessed for everything you’ve given me / Blessed for all the tenderness you show / Do my best with every breath that’s in me / Blessed to make sure you never go…”
The Reason: Because that is how I feel every single day since I found you.

The Song: For All of My Life, For Real
The Words: “…For all of my life / You are the one / I will love you faithfully forever / All of my life / You are the one / I give to you my greatest love / For all of my life…”
The Reason: This was playing on the radio when you brought me over to my uncle’s house. That was a Sunday. I told you I fell in love on a Sunday.

The Song: Begin Again, Taylor Swift
The Words: “…I’ve been spending the last eight months / Thinking all love ever does is break and burn and end / But on a Wednesday in a cafe I watched it begin again…”
The Reason: Because on a Saturday in McDonald’s I watched it begin again.

The Song: By Your Side, Sade
The Words: “…When you’re lost and you’re alone and you cant get back again / I will find you darling and i will bring you home…”
The Reason: It’s Sade. And it’s jazz. It’s something I would dance to. And because I will always be there, by your side.

The Song: Have I Told You Lately (That I Love You), Rod Stewart
The Words: “Have I told you lately that I love you / Have I told you there’s no one else above you / Fill my heart with gladness / Take away all my sadness / Ease my troubles that’s what you do…”
The Reason: Because even though I have learned enough to always love myself a little more, I will always love you first and myself second.

The Song: When I Need You, Rod Stewart
The Words: “…When I need you / I just close my eyes and I’m with you / And all that I so want to give you baby / It’s only a heart beat away…”
The Reason: If I could give you everything you want, I would.

The Song: Everything Has Changed, Taylor Swift feat. Ed Sheeran
The Words: “…’Cause all I know is we said, “Hello.” / And your eyes look like coming home / All I know is a simple name / Everything has changed / All I know is you held the door / You’ll be mine and I’ll be yours / All I know since yesterday is everything has changed…”
The Reason: Because finally I have come home.

The Song: Over the Rainbow, Eva Cassidy
The Words: “…Somewhere over the rainbow, skies are blue / And the dreams that you dare to dream really do come true.”
The Reason: You always said this song sounded like hope. You, in turn, are my hope.

*          *          *

I will always love you.

 

 

Blessed Be…

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17.13: This One’s for You

A Life Story.

My Life in Verse

To the one who said she would always defend…
To the one who said we’d always be friends…
To the one who I will always regret…
To the one who will never, ever forget…

To the one who still cannot forgive…
To the one who said she would never leave…
To the one who broke my mending heart…
To the ones who took and would then depart…

To the one who was able to begin anew…
To the one who remains a friend so true…
To the one who finally came back home…
To the one who always called me his own…

To the one who taught me how to fall…
To the one who taught me to stand so tall…
To the one who taught me how to see…
To the one who said they should love me for me…

To the ones who hurt, who burned, and lied…
To the ones who thought I would be silent and cry…
To the ones who are only brave when amidst a throng…
To the ones I proved to have been wrong…

To the one who hurt me without meaning to…
To the one who spoke without being spoken to…
To the one who filled my heart with bliss…
To the one who will be my one last kiss…

To the only one I would have said,
“With this ring, I thee wed”…
To the one who loved me at first sight…
To the one I will love until last light…

To the one I come home to in the dark of night…
To the one I wake up to in the morning light…
To the one whose life mine is entwined to…
To the one I love… This one’s for you.

 

 

Blessed Be…

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13.13: Always

Happy birthday, Butterfly.

Mommy loves you.

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12.13: As Sharp as Broken Glass

There are days like today when I lose my mind a little and start checking things that I shouldn’t be checking out anymore. For those of you who think this is another shout out to the recipient of this post, you’re sorely mistaken. There will be no names (Yes, I did that before. Yes, I have gotten over it. No, I do not regret doing that.) but I have no doubt you’ll know if it’s for you.

I think I think this is an entry that has been a long time coming. Maybe it’s something that I probably should have written several months ago, but didn’t. But what does it matter? I’m finally writing it.

*          *          *

Dear You,

I miss you. I miss us. I miss the time when I would see you at least once every week – when we had become fixtures in that Indian restaurant conveniently situated near our respective offices. I miss bringing you to your building before taking the cab home. I miss you telling the cab driver to make sure he took good care of me.

I miss how you always used to be there… How you made me feel like you would love me no matter what happened. I miss the times when it was so clear that you and I were always going to be in each other’s lives. We both made bad choices and many, many mistakes and I guess I always thought our friendship was stronger than that.

Was I wrong?

Sometimes I still wonder about what really happened. Sometimes I wish I knew the reason why you suddenly went away. Sometimes I wish I didn’t care… Then maybe I wouldn’t wonder so much.

No, I don’t understand and there are so many moments when I wish I did. You were there when I was broken and trying to find my way back and it’s just the saddest thing that now that I’m so incredibly happy, you are the one person I cannot share it with.

I will always wonder about you, I think. No matter what has come to pass, you will always be part of my story. I will always be grateful to you.

I wish you every happiness. And I will always wish you peace.

In Memoriam,
Me

*          *          *

 

 

Blessed Be…

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